Baby Mama Drama

10 May

Just a warning: If you’re a dude currently reading this, you might want to evacuate. I’m about to talk about breasts… Not mine in particular, but breasts just the same. And I promise it won’t be a pleasant conversation for you.

Ok, now that we’ve weeded out some people, I’ll continue with my regularly scheduled post.

Breast pumps. Storage Bags. Trays. Milk Collector/Saver. Car adapter. Breast shield. Membranes. Valves.

Independently, I’m comfortable with my definitions of each of the above words. When they’re all used in a paragraph or one isolated conversation, I begin to freak. I don’t know what these are and/or I don’t know what to do with them if I figured it out.

In short, I know nothing about trying to take care of a baby. I have one single box that contains all of Baby K’s belongings. Most of its contents were lovingly passed down, some were purchased new by thoughtful friends and family. The point is- His need to be clothed will definitely be taken care of. His other needs? Ya know, the really important ones? Food, Shelter. And how bout the need for knowledgeable parents? Those are still up in the air.

I’m trying not to be all baby mama drama on you, but it is worth noting that I’m worried. I’m worried that we don’t have a house in LA yet. I’m worried about the move. I’m worried about the transition. I’m worried that I’ll have this beautiful baby boy, but I won’t know how to make him happy. Will I feed him when he really just has gas? Will I miss a wet diaper because I’m too busy writing papers for school? What if I am so tired throughout the day that I neglect my husband at night? What if I’m a terrible parent?

Some people just don’t have that natural ability to care for a newborn. I’m afraid I’ll be that girl.

I think it’s only my fear of breast pumps and delivery…you know- the unknown- that is freaking me out. I like to know what I’m getting into and right now I feel pretty clueless. Trips to the labor and delivery wing of the hospital may calm me. Classes to practice breathing techniques and study breast feeding strategies might make me feel better. But sadly, I can’t participate in any of these until we move. Then, will it be too late?

Oh, be still my heart. I can’t wait for Baby K, but I know how unprepared I feel, too.

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9 Responses to “Baby Mama Drama”

  1. Beth May 10, 2011 at 8:44 pm #

    “Will I feed him when he really just has gas? Will I miss a wet diaper because I’m too busy writing papers for school? What if I am so tired throughout the day that I neglect my husband at night?”

    Yep. I think all these things will happen, and you know what? He’ll be fine. 😉

    Its scary to think about it and with your first its pretty much all unknown (unless you are a member of the Duggar family or something). Try not to worry so much, and know that I was in your exact situation 1.5 years ago and we’re (AJ and I) are both fine.

    You will be surprised at how much comes naturally and how quickly you learn the rest of it.

  2. Mrs. K May 10, 2011 at 9:04 pm #

    Thank you, Beth.I needed the reminder! I’m sure I’ll do just fine. That’s a good point mixed in there, too- I bet the Duggar kids don’t have any of these reservations. They’re ole pros by now! Glad you and AJ are doing well. She is precious.

  3. Mrs. Burgher May 10, 2011 at 10:23 pm #

    I love that you are not afraid to be honest about your questions! Honestly, I never spoke to a lactation consultant for either of my kids, I just ended up doing what felt natural…but I did have supportive nurses. Twitter has been a big help for me with my 2nd baby because I didn’t get to nurse my daughter long (her allergies) and I didn’t have anyone close to me nursing. Feel free to follow me, @mrsgregwillis and ask questions…if I don’t know, I have a list of great #bfing advocates. You are going to be a great mama, just because you are willing to be open and ponder things like this!!!

  4. Laura Jenkins May 11, 2011 at 8:14 am #

    I love reading about your fears and doubts because I went through the same kinds of things and it is nice to hear it from people that you know instead of some person you have never met out of a magazine or book. Just know that your maternal instincts will kick into high gear once he gets here and you will know what to do without knowing where the knowledge came from!!! Good luck girlie!!

  5. Alyson May 11, 2011 at 11:09 am #

    Having two children I can totally relate to the uncertainty and nervousness and such that comes with being a mom for the first time. I can assure you, no one knew less about babies than me before I had Caylin, and the knowledge doesn’t automatically come with having a baby. Yes, you will sometimes try to feed him when he has gas, but you will eventually figure it out and you will be a great mom. And if you have any questions always feel free to ask 🙂

    P.S. If you are planning on breastfeeding the best piece of advice I could give would be to make sure he takes a bottle sometimes too. I never gave Ashlyn a bottle because I never saw the need to and now she is 10 months old and refuses to drink a bottle and I am the only one that can feed her. Ever.

  6. Kaylee May 11, 2011 at 11:31 am #

    Oh girl, I was in the same place you are about 3 weeks ago! This can definitely be overwhelming but you will be great. I know I say that and you think well you nor I know that, but you will. It helped me to take a breast feeding class and tour my delivering hospital so I could ask questions and see that I’m not the only one, plus answers put your mind at ease.
    I have worked at a day care for years and all of a sudden I am scared to hold someone else’s baby because I am scared I am going to do something wrong.

    Just remind yourself that you have so much love and support from so many people in real life and here in the blog world! You will be great 🙂

  7. Mrs. K May 11, 2011 at 4:08 pm #

    @Mrs. Burgher- I’m following you now. Thanks!
    @Laura- I’m glad to hear that this is a normal fear. Thanks for responding! 🙂
    @Alyson- Yes, I plan on pumping and using a bottle, too. It’s important to me to let J be able to feed him, as well. With his schedule at the upcoming post, he will likely have little time with the baby so I think him being able to help feed will be a good bonding time for them. P.S.- See you soon! Can’t wait.
    @Kaylee- Thanks for the support. I do seem to feel a little more at ease each day when I finish another chapter in a feeding book or research my various questions floating around in my brain. I hope you’re feeling well. We’re almost in the 3rd trimester. Woot!

  8. k May 11, 2011 at 4:49 pm #

    I can totally sympathize with your situation. We PCSd when I was 36 weeks and didn’t have our house secured until we arrived. It was nerve-racking but I tried to stay as relaxed as I could for the baby’s sake. I delivered at 38 weeks, but thankfully we were ready for her before the move so all the preparation was done. As for breastfeeding, I totally recommend taking a class if your hospital/dr’s office offers it. We took one right before we moved and I learned a lot and it calmed my fears and insecurities about breastfeeding. I am a really heavy sleeper and I was so worried I wouldn’t hear the baby at night. It’s like something in your body turns on, your instincts take over and everything works out. I think you’ll surprise yourself! 🙂

Trackbacks/Pingbacks

  1. One Mississippi « Mrs. K and Captain J - May 11, 2011

    […] One Mississippi Pregnant With Laughter is on hiatus today. I figure you’re all babied out for now due to my last post. […]

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