Crazies and Prayers

20 Jul

I have no idea what’s wrong with me. I might be going crazy. It’s possible. I just wrote an uber long entry in my journal discussing my insane emotional issues today and I just can’t bring myself to post them on here because as I read back through them now, I see that I’m bonkers. I accept it. But that doesn’t change the fact that I’m going crazy.

I can’t even tell you what all it’s about because the issues are so miniscule. I have no idea how Captain J puts up with me. I really don’t.

Anyway, now that THAT precursor is out of the way (and you got to see a busty blonde caraciture that doesn’t resemble me in the slightest), I’d like to give you a piece of my mind! Don’t worry…I won’t yell and scream and use the oh-so-insulting all caps. I just wanted to say that phrase.

As a civilian, I have always held our troops in utmost respect. Before I met J was no different. I have a binder that holds every bible study I’ve ever done since the beginning of college and I will venture to guess that 80 % of my prayer lists have our troops listed there. Why did I just type that? I sound weird and braggy or something. Anyway, I’m proud of those men and women who put their lives on the line for this country and I know what a hard job it can sometimes be. When I married into the military, my perspective began to change. Actually, it grew from admiration to a proud feeling that I can’t really describe. I almost feel unworthy to be a part of or affiliated with the Army, but I know my role in standing by him is important, too.

When Captain J’s brother, Jesse, commissioned into the Army this past December I was equally proud. I never imagined I would be considered part of a military family but now I am…and I guess I always was (both grandfathers served as well as my stepdad). Anyway, while I’m very happy for Jesse, I’m also sad, too. He’s off to Germany. Half of me is jealous, but the other half is excited for him because I know he’ll have a great time exploring that part of the world. I just know that I was really looking forward to seeing everyone together again when we finally make it home and then I realized that he probably won’t be there. I hate that!

This Army life can be difficult, but it’s our life right now and I wouldn’t change it a bit.

I wouldn’t change the military part, but I might tinker with some other small things like my crazy, annoying, yet loveable dog who I have recently renamed- “The Dog That Broke The Camel’s Back”. Or maybe I’d change the fact that my roots are showing. I’m sporting them around Fairbanks, slightly ashamed. I’m going to peace out now and try to hit the hay. It was my hope in writing this that you might pray for my brother-in-law today as he makes his way to Germany. Oh, and if you’re really tight with God, could you ask him to help me from the downward spiral into the looney bin? Thanks a million!

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5 Responses to “Crazies and Prayers”

  1. Laura Weigle July 21, 2010 at 4:40 am #

    What can I do to help?? Jess will be home for Christmas so we will all be together soon! It’s hard saying so long to loved ones, but like you, I’m fiercely proud of my 3 kids! I’ve got that strange peaceful feeling again like when Jordan deployed. I think it’s a God thing! Love you!

  2. Lydia July 21, 2010 at 6:39 am #

    both my grandfathers were in the military, but only my mom’s dad actually made a career in it. My mom was an army brat all her life.

    My ex boyfriend was in the marines.. and although it was hard for me not seeing him, I loved being a marine’s girlfriend..

    I really support the troops and admire all those men and women that actually put their lives at risk for their country.. for us..

  3. kimbodarlin July 21, 2010 at 11:44 am #

    Super K—first of all….you are not “going bonkers”. That is something everyone else will notice first, not you! I’m not sure why you are having a bad day but remember what I have always told you:

    Life is what you make it.

    It will be better tomorrow.

    This is just another chapter in YOUR Book of Life.

    You can always find someone in worse shape than you.

    We love you, miss you, and are counting the days until you are home. We wish Jordan was coming with you but understand why he can’t and we thank him for his service. We will pray for Jesse, too. Call me if you need to talk…..Love ya’ lots–Mom

  4. Mrs. K July 21, 2010 at 10:29 pm #

    Love you guys! Just knowing you all care helps a lot.

  5. household 6 hooah July 22, 2010 at 7:58 am #

    Hello Mrs K –

    I’ve often said that in order to be an Army wife, you need to be a little crazy!

    I, too, get sad about not having the family together. We are currently overseas and it’s hard not to see my parents and my sister and her family. But like you said, it is part of our life.

    And while I’m here, I met my husband at Ft Wainwright and we spent the first 10 months of our married life there. When I left, I was also 14 weeks pregnant! To date, it is one of my favorite duty stations.

    Take care,

    Household 6 Hooah

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